Differences Between Liberals and Conservatives

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From the Boortz Blast:

No, I didn’t write this. I wish I did. Because it’s the painful truth. And you know how much I love to stir the puddin’. This list was actually forwarded to me from a friend of mine … Ain’t this the truth?

If a conservative doesn’t like guns, he doesn’t buy one.
If a liberal doesn’t like guns, he wants all guns outlawed.

If a conservative is a vegetarian, he doesn’t eat meat.
If a liberal is a vegetarian, he wants all meat products banned for everyone.

If a conservative sees a foreign threat, he thinks about how to defeat his enemy.
If a liberal sees a foreign threat, he wonders how to surrender gracefully and still look good.

If a conservative is homosexual, he quietly leads his life.
If a liberal is homosexual, he demands legislated respect.

If a person of color is conservative, he sees himself as independently successful.
If a person of color is liberal, he sees himself as a victim in need of government protection.

If a conservative is down-and-out, he thinks about how to better his situation.
If a liberal is down-and-out, he wonders who is going to take care of him.

If a conservative doesn’t like a talk show host, he switches channels.
If a liberal doesn’t like a talk show host, he demands that those he doesn’t like be shut down.

If a conservative is a non-believer, he doesn’t go to church.
If a liberal is a non-believer, he wants any mention of God and religion silenced. (Unless it’s a foreign religion, of course!)

If a conservative decides he needs health care, he goes about shopping for it, or may choose a job that provides it.
If a liberal decides he needs health care, he demands that the rest of us pay for his.

If a conservative slips and falls in a store, he gets up, laughs and is embarrassed.
If a liberal slips and falls, he grabs his neck, moans like he’s in labor and then sues.

If a conservative reads this, he’ll forward it so his friends can have a good laugh.
If a liberal reads this, he’ll delete it because he’s “offended”.

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About turtlemom3

Early 70’s Orthodox Christian, wife, mother, grandmother, nurse with PhD, disabled. Have wonderful service dog - Warrior! Married to the Ol’ Curmudgeon - and I’m pretty doggone happy about that! Interests: Orthodox Christianity; reading; service dogs; computers, woodworking Greatest Life Experiences: Converting to Orthodoxy, Caving in Idaho, Attending Russian Orthodox Choir Conference (Oh! that music!). Favorite Things Back in High School: Reading; classical music - nerdy things. Favorite Things Back in College: Reading; classical music - nerdy things Favorite Things to do Now: Reading; classical music, computer stuff, surfing the internet - nerdy things - no real change! Favorite TV Programs: Anything about Sci-fi or forensics - or both? Favorite Movies: The Chosen; Ostrov; 84 Charing Cross Rd; Air Force One; Becket; Indiana Jones; Star Wars; Favorite Music: Russian Orthodox (Christian) chant; Bach; Mozart's Magic Flute Favorite Quote: The body is a slave, the soul a sovereign, and therefore it is due to Divine mercy when the body is worn out by illness: for thereby the passions are weakened, and a man comes to himself; indeed, bodily illness itself is sometimes caused by the passions.”~*~ St. Seraphim of Sarov, Spiritual Instructions Favorite Authors: Robert Heinlein; Mercedes Lackey; Anne MacCaffrey, Fr. Steven Ritter, Sarah Elizabeth Cowrie, St. Nikolai Velimirovic - among many others

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