Things I Have Learned From Living in Georgia…

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Possums sleep in the middle of the road, with their feet in the air.

There are 5,000 types of snakes on earth and 4,998 live in Georgia.

There are 10,000 types of spiders.  All 10,000 live in Georgia, plus a couple no one’s seen before.

If it grows – it sticks; ….  if it crawls – it bites.

Onced and Twiced are words.

It is not a shopping cart; it is a buggy.

People actually grow and eat okra.

There is no such thing as ‘lunch.’  There is only dinner and then there  is supper.

Iced tea is appropriate for all meals and you start drinking it when you’re two.  We do like a little tea with our sugar!

Backards and forwards means ‘I know everything about you.’

You don’t have to wear a watch, because it doesn’t matter what time it is.  You work until you’re done, or it’s too dark to see.

You don’ t PUSH buttons, you MASH them.

You measure distance in minutes.

Sometimes you have to switch from ‘heat’ to ‘A/C’ in the same day.

‘Fix’ is a verb.  Example: ‘I’m fixing to go to the store.’ ‘Fixinto’ is one word.

All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit, vegetable, grain, insect, or animal.

You install security lights on your house, and garage, and leave both unlocked.

You know what a ‘DAWG’ is.

You carry jumper cables in your car . . . for your OWN car.

There are only own four spices:  salt, pepper, Tabasco, and ketchup.

The local papers cover national and international news on one page, but require six pages for local gossip and sports.

The first day of deer season is a state holiday. 100 degrees Fahrenheit is ‘a little warm.’

Going to Wal-mart is a favorite past time known as ‘goin’ Wal-martin’, or off to ‘Wally World.’

A cool snap (below 70 degrees) is good pinto-bean weather.

A carbonated soft drink isn’t a soda, cola or pop . . . it’s a Coke, Regardless of brand or flavor.  Example:  ‘What kinda coke you want?’

Fried catfish is the other white meat.

We don’t need no stinking driver’s ed . . . if our mama says we can drive, we can drive.

If you understand these jokes please forward them to your friends from Georgia (and those who just wish they were).

EVERYONE can’t be a Georgian; it takes talent.  You might say it’s an art form, or a gift from God!

Thanks to dj46 who sent these lovely little thoughts!

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About turtlemom3

Early 70’s Orthodox Christian, wife, mother, grandmother, nurse with PhD, disabled. Have wonderful service dog - Warrior! Married to the Ol’ Curmudgeon - and I’m pretty doggone happy about that! Interests: Orthodox Christianity; reading; service dogs; computers, woodworking Greatest Life Experiences: Converting to Orthodoxy, Caving in Idaho, Attending Russian Orthodox Choir Conference (Oh! that music!). Favorite Things Back in High School: Reading; classical music - nerdy things. Favorite Things Back in College: Reading; classical music - nerdy things Favorite Things to do Now: Reading; classical music, computer stuff, surfing the internet - nerdy things - no real change! Favorite TV Programs: Anything about Sci-fi or forensics - or both? Favorite Movies: The Chosen; Ostrov; 84 Charing Cross Rd; Air Force One; Becket; Indiana Jones; Star Wars; Favorite Music: Russian Orthodox (Christian) chant; Bach; Mozart's Magic Flute Favorite Quote: The body is a slave, the soul a sovereign, and therefore it is due to Divine mercy when the body is worn out by illness: for thereby the passions are weakened, and a man comes to himself; indeed, bodily illness itself is sometimes caused by the passions.”~*~ St. Seraphim of Sarov, Spiritual Instructions Favorite Authors: Robert Heinlein; Mercedes Lackey; Anne MacCaffrey, Fr. Steven Ritter, Sarah Elizabeth Cowrie, St. Nikolai Velimirovic - among many others

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